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In case you haven’t heard (this is a guide for idiots, after all) with the advent of the Internet, it is now within the realm of possibility—no, a very real possibility—that one can now play the riveting, nail biting game known the world over as Bingo on the Internet. That’s right—playing from the comfort of your armchair, you can now become that worldwide Bingo champion you’ve always secretly longed to be. How does this work, you ask? Well, you first have to register on an actually Bingo gaming site. If you’re playing for money (not recommended for idiots) you also open an account at said site. After you pay money into this newly-created account, you then buy a randomly allocated bingo card—you know, the one with a grid and random numbers on it. Numbered balls are then chosen after the card is selected. One then checks off the numbers (if any) that correlate to the numbered balls that appeared. And in case you’re still wondering how a winner is determined, you’re in luck because I was just going to tell you: once all the numbers on your card are checked off, you’re then considered the winner. Aren’t you glad you found this idiot’s guide? Believe it or not, both idiots and geniuses can be short on money, so for that special breed of Bingo enthusiast, there are also free sites. You still must register, however. One last note for all you idiots out there: when playing for money on these sites, make sure the site possesses a gaming license as online Bingo is in fact not legal within the United States and in other parts of the world. A little investigation into the site’s owners, location and miscellaneous information will go a long way to ensuring that idiots like you don’t end up in jail or fined.
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